Heal a Broken Heart
Looking for affection from unavailable people is an act self-harm. It’s self-harming behavior because, deep down at your vulnerable core (where you sometimes rather not look), you know you’re not going to receive their affection. Not in a healthy way at least. Not in way that you truly deserve. Deep down you know that they can’t be there for you in the way that you need them to. Deep down you know that you’re going to get hurt (and will continue to hurt the more that you pursue them).
You see, something we avoid or try to bypass the job of loving ourselves. We outsource it. We seek somebody else to do it for us. But happines and fulfillment has always been an inside job. And until you begin working on that (your happines is YOUR responsibility and nobody else’s), you will continue to find unhealthy ways of coping. The same way that alcohol and other drugs are unhealthy and unsustainable coping mechanisms, so is looking for love from unavailable people.
Your love is valid. Even if it’s unrequited. Your heartbreak is valid too. Even if it’s self-inflicted. And healing from heartbreak is not a journey, it’s a fight. As if having to say goodbye hadn’t already taken every bit of energy you had, now you’re left surviving this aftermath: Carrying a broken heart that aches. Constantly.
Walking an endless field of memories that unexpectedly explode at every turn, like proximity mines hidden in everyday life. And, lingering in the air, the depressing smell of something that already has been, like smoke from a fire that had been keeping you warm.
What do we do with the dead weight of dreams that didn’t come true? how do we fix a clock that has stopped counting the NOW and is stuck, wanting to go back in time to the moment where everything started to go wrong and change it?
How do we recover the pieces of ourselves that have left with the relationship? I don’t mean to sound overly dramatic, I just know that healing from heartbreak is one hell of a fight and someon out there may need to hear this today:
THE END OF A RELATIONSHIP IS NOT THE END OF YOU
This aftermath is a time to heal and recover. And you don’t have to do this alone. But remember: losing a relationship doesn’t have to mean losing yourself. Keep fighting the good fight.
